Dear Darren,
I am so sorry that I killed Buster. Karley loved that damn dog more than anything in the world! Didn’t you tell me once that she snuck him into school more times that you could even count? Well the point is that I feel terrible. Please don’t tell her that it was me who ran him over. I know she’d probably never forgive me. I think you should sit Karley down and tell her this instead:
“Now look Karley, I know you think you saw your Grandma run over Buster with her car, but what you actually saw was something else completely. What really happened, was that aliens came and abducted your dog. They wanted a souvenir to bring back to their planet and I’m sorry, but what they really wanted was Buster. And who could blame them? Buster was frickin awesome! But the aliens knew how sad you’d be. So they played some mind tricks on you and made you believe you saw Grandma running over Buster and brutally killing him. I’m sorry your dog was abducted but it’s ok. Because Grandma got you a kitten! And now you can forget all about Buster!”
This would probably be a good time to mention that I’m bringing the kitten over tomorrow. Don’t worry, I bought the litter box so that you don’t have to. And make sure she buys this story because I’m sick of feeling guilty all the time.
Thankyou!!!
Grandma
No comments:
Post a Comment